Be around people who are good for your mental health

It’s funny how at some point in my life, I used to feel offended when someone would tell me that I was so picky. With things and people. I didn’t like it because it made me feel as though I was a bad person for wanting specific things and people, which of course I did. I was so hard on myself, and in a desperate need to prove people wrong, I would try to blend in by accommodating all types of vibrations and frequencies that people presented. Trying to adopt the ‘good person’ syndrome.

This cost me myself. In an attempt to fit everyone in my space, I was losing myself because my energy was getting tainted. The moment it dawned on me that I can’t make everyone happy, and certainly can’t accommodate the entire world in my life, I gained a certain type of freedom I can’t explain.

With time, I came to realize that being picky is actually a pretty good thing. Heck, it’s mandatory to be picky if you’re at all a self-respecting person, and I’m picky asf. It doesn’t make me a bad person. I can’t imagine living a life where I’m simply swayed by whatever comes my way without having a footing on what I perceive as good or bad for me.

Being intentional about what you want is very important. Being clear and upfront about what you like and don’t like is equally important. We all have personal preferences in everything, which is okay. What’s not okay is putting up with something that you very well know you don’t sync with. You put up with things to a point you change a part of who you are just to blend in.

We give too many people the power to lower our vibrations and in the end, we are left trying to figure out why our energy is off. You can’t really explain why you’re feeling some type of way, but you notice you only feel it after hanging out with certain people or engaging in certain conversations.

You honestly don’t have to put up with things that shift your energy negatively just so people may like you or you may seem a certain way. Be nice, but be yourself. If the person you are doesn’t quite fit somewhere, then that just tells you that you shouldn’t be there in the first place and that’s totally okay. The people meant to be in your life will gravitate to you and embrace you just as you are.

The best friendships are ones where you can be yourself without fear of being judged or rejected. They’re purely organic. Not forced. You thrive massively when you’re around the people who are healthy for you mentally and emotionally.

Strive to surround yourself with people who feed your fire. Those who see you in a way that uplifts your spirit and zeal to live and grow. You’re not obligated to make anyone happy if it means compromising your well-being. Anything or anyone that demands you sacrifice your peace of mind, or a vital part of who you are, isn’t worth keeping or fighting for.

You don’t need permission to tell someone how they’re behaving is negatively impacting your mental health. You also don’t need permission to cut people off if they’re having an inimical effect on your self-worth.

Life is too short to waste time in spaces that aren’t good for you, and with people who don’t bring out the best in you. You deserve relationships made of love, empathy, understanding, loyalty, support, and warmth, not ones that have you second-guessing yourself, questioning your worthiness of happiness, feeling miserable, and like you can’t open up. You are in control of every situation, and in control of the people you choose to keep in your life. If something doesn’t feel right, is making you uncomfortable, or affecting your happiness, you have the right to walk away or change it. Whether it’s a job contributing towards your depression, a toxic relationship that makes you feel unworthy, or merely a conversation between friends about a subject that triggers you.

Allow yourself to have authority over what and who you’re engaging with. You aren’t a bad person for not wanting to listen to a conversation that makes you uncomfortable. You aren’t a bad person for needing friends who care about you and accept you, regardless of your situation. And you certainly aren’t a bad person for needing to offload and talk about your feelings. Remember, it’s OKAY to protect yourself. It’s NECESSARY.

Whether we realize it or not we become like the 5 people we spend the most time with. We start behaving like them, thinking like them, looking like them, we even make decisions based on what we think they would want us to do. If you feel emotionally drained by the energy vampires in your life, you may want to detox your entire being and get rid of the relationships that no longer serve you. Detoxing your life from negative influencers will also allow you to become the person you truly want to be. You’ll free yourself from constant judgment, negativity, and lack of support.